Repentance does not cause a sense of sin— it causes a sense of inexpressible unworthiness. When I repent, I realize that I am absolutely helpless, and I know that through and through I am not worthy even to carry His sandals. Have I repented like that, or do I have a lingering thought of possibly trying to defend my actions? The reason God cannot come into my life is that I am not at the point of complete repentance. Oswald chambers
As I am reading this it takes me back to surrendering. I almost feel that repentance and surrendering go hand and hand. I have an area in my life that I know I have not completely surrendered. You may ask, “how is that working for you?” well …. It is not, but I am working on it. I have to be honest there are times when I feel like I have completely surrendered and I do have peace.
Jeremiah 38:17 Then Jeremiah said to Zedekiah, “Thus says the Lord, the God of hosts, the God of Israel: ‘If you surely surrender to the king of Babylon’s princes, (or whatever is going on in your life right now) then your soul shall live; this city shall not be burned with fire, and you and your house shall live. Here is what I know for me. My life is so much calmer when I surrender.
Let me tell you what real surrender is. It is simply resting in the love of the Lord, as a little baby rests in his mother arms. A perfect surrender must even be willing to quit surrendering, if that is what the Lord wants. We renounce ourselves, and yet, God never lets us know when it is complete. If we knew, it would no longer BE complete, for there is nothing that bolsters the ego quiet so much as knowing that it is fully surrendered. Surrender consist, not in doing great, heroic deeds about which self can brag, but simply in accepting whatever God sends, and not seeking to change it. Full surrender is full peace. If we are restless and concerned about things that are formally renounced, we have not genuinely surrendered. Surrender is the source of true peace. If we are not at peace. It is because our surrender is not complete.
This whole week with Oswald Chambers has really spoken to me about rest.
Matthew 11:28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.